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Fiona Duffy

Siddal

I was sick, so sick,

but there was no changing


the lust in the eyes

feeding on my face.


The language of flowers

and frigid bathwater


was my horrific protection

of sustained existence.


(I was only twenty

Dignified in primitive plainness

I was transcendent and ideal

when I wasn’t clinging to the brush

moving wild and unwanted

amplified by heartbreak

I should’ve known true love wasn’t given

This is only earth)


I was not speechless but rather

stalled at the threshold of scrutiny

as every dream passed by me.


Tell me, did I look pretty

when you dug your poetry

out of my hollow stomach?


I’m sorry

the worms and I

ate through your lyrics.


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