i think that the radiator in my house may be broken
the temperature gauge is way off, its either much too hot or much too cold;
cold air can cause water to freeze inside a radiator and cause it to burst
i've learned that you need to shut off the water, contact insurance, and most importantly contact a plumbing professional if you’re facing a burst pipe
this winter i found to be particularly cold
the kind of cold where the wind threatens to gnaw your ears off but lacks the late nights when the world is silent with snow
my disconsolate solace
blood fills me like a bathtub
my home was no longer warm
the pipe had burst
the cold air became too much, a radiator is not often prepared to take on so much frigidity at once
for some, a burst radiator pipe is an inconvenience,
my house was devastated
it looked fine from the outside, passerbys wouldn’t know of the wreckage and debris that turned my once beautiful home into a skeleton adorned with fragments of what it used to be
mourning, misuse, moving
i considered moving
moving is a big commitment
and not a decision you should make when you have a burst radiator pipe
but that home was unfit for a comfortable life
painful to breathe, to move, to work, to sleep; my bedsheets were cold
I considered moving.
the gas pipe that lead to my house had shut off
i didn’t know of the reason
i came to the gas company with bloody and bruised knees,
i am oxidized
Begging
Begging and grasping for anything i could get
Red pavement red wallpaper red eyes
My heart was under the wallpaper
My laughter was hidden in the cabinets
My eyes were in the support beams
Haunted house, Mary in the mirror
Reflect refract relapse
I shouldn’t beg for the bare necessities
But when you look in the mirror and don’t see yourself in the reflection
Your nails find familiarity that keeps you safe and warm and clutches on like a father to his child
Lose your radiator lose your home lose yourself